Friday, April 18, 2008

Where did that cloud come from??

The past couple weeks I have been dealing with something that I'm VERY not used to.... I know that God has really given me such joy in life and I love to laugh constantly so what happened? Well the light seemed to dim.... I had NO clue what was going on! All I knew was that I couldn't hear from God clearly! There was so much confusion everytime I would try and listen for him! Just plain static! I got really upset about it which then got me into this depressed state! "What the heck!!!! THIS is NOT me!" I would think so many times!

Sometimes I felt God was leading me one way but then at the same time the other way! It was craziness! I finally met up with one of my friends and found out that she was dealing with the exact same thing and that a couple nights earlier we were dealing with the same kind of depression! I didn't want to do anything!
Finally, last week I broke down to my dad and was like "DAD! I don't know what to do! I can't hear God's voice clearly and I feel like I'm just hearing everything under the sun to distract me!" It was amazing too because that morning it was just getting pretty rough and finally I cried out to God asking Him for a clear word from Him! Well I went to church that morning and my dad was talking all about distractions and that when you are on your way to victory so many times the enemy will try and stop it with confusion and distractions! To combat it we have to get pumped up with the word!! The higher the word "level" we have in our hearts the harder it is for the enemy to lie to us! That afternoon when I was sharing everything with my dad finally he is like "Sarah, just go up into your room and start confessing the word!" He was like do it even if you have to for 3 days! Don't let the enemy get a foothold! I went right up and started praying, reading the bible and worshipping!! Then I wrote a little prayer out to keep my mind on track and I just said it over and over and over again until I felt this thing lift and guess what?? It did!!!! Thank God!!

It's interesting too because during that time I was looking back in my journal at the different scriptures that God had given me and one was from Isaiah 60:1- Arise from the depression and prostration in which circumstances have kept you-rise to a new life! Shine be radiant with the glory of the Lord, for your light has come, and the glory of the Lord has risen upon you!
When I first got that verse I was like, God I'm not depressed!! He was just preparing me though and giving me weapons against the enemy!

He also showed me Luke 4 which basically in there it talks about right before Jesus came into his REAL calling that he had to go through a time of testing so he was led out into the desert and was tested and tempted by the enemy there for 40 days!! Wow!! Mine only lasted a couple days he was MUCH more enduring that I am! ha! After the devil took him to all these places and even tempted him with scripture Jesus still said no because he knew why He was there and what His calling truly was! So it was easy for him to say no!! And to say no WITH the scripture!! Just like I was doing! After that whole time he was then indued with power and then was released into His full calling!! Even though the path was mighty rough getting there I'm SURE it was worth it! Especially since he passed that test of temptation!!
I know this is something that a lot of you deal with!! You CAN pass it!!! Say NO to the enemy now with the word! And watch that cloud disperse!! I love you all so much!! :)